Work and Life – That is the balance

Work and Life – That is the balance

gettyimages-170068121-1024x1016In the creative field, I’m constantly reading articles, interviews, and posts about how to maintain a work/life balance or how to grasp the daunting reality that there isn’t one and everyone just needs to deal with it. Some pretty intense thoughts to say the least, however, I’ve found equilibrium.

My life motivates my work. I recently went through a pretty confusing break up with my 10-year long boyfriend, I’ll spare the gruesome details but my reality was sleepless nights and tear stained pillows for weeks. Unfortunately everything seemed to fall out of place during the holidays so I found myself entering the New Year broken-hearted, hurt, and oddly distracted.

At first, I was so consumed in my feelings of loss and sadness that there were days that I stayed in bed. But it was in lying there sulking that I realized the story behind my pain and began to write. By putting a name to these feelings, a timeline, characters, and just the realness of my situation into words I found comfort. I went back to work after the holiday break with a fire from the story that I had written and shared with friends. I decided to throw myself into work whole heartedly despite what was going on around me.

Often times, I feel like women have two ways of dealing with emotional distress or just relationship issues. Either we’re so sad it’s all we think about in this seemingly depressed state for a while or we try to completely distract our hearts by busying ourselves with anything else. For me finding this balance was almost balancing both of those. Putting this focus on work and writing wasn’t to distract my pain but instead use it my benefit.

I got to work about 2 hours early daily and really went into grind mode, translating my feelings into focus on all things for my team brand. How can we scale? What can I be doing better to get us to where we need to go? What will the rest of this year look like? This is my balance. Not only feeling but truly being productive despite the flaws in my life made up for the loss I was experiencing. While I know my work won’t comfort me at night, during the day, however, I find peace in productivity.

I can’t say that this particular way of thinking can be an end all be all for all, but it can be a shift of mindset for those who may be experiencing similar situations. Life will always be a factor, it will throw curveballs at us when we least expect it that sometimes may boost our confidence or maybe hurt it. But if we have work that  we really care about and work we enjoy, that work can and should motivate us and work for us with life’s battles. Way easier said than done for sure, but what do we have to lose?

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When Passion Meets Action

When Passion Meets Action

Everyone has a passion for something. There are people who live, breath, and think music on all levels at all times. Some of these kinds of people are called audiophiles. “An audiophile is a person enthusiastic about high fidelity sound reproduction,” by Wikipedia definition. This kind of person is passionate about creation, innovation and the idea of bringing music to life through different outlets and by any means. Music legends that began in the era before mine found this very niche; their sound, their vibe, lingo and style carried out into the generations after mine. And this was because they believed in something bigger then themselves, so much so that the world began to believe in it too.

That’s the funny thing about dream chasing and loving something for what it is not what it can bring you. We have the power to be and do anything we set our minds to but we must first be willing to take the risk. It’s not easy following the path you love, whether your passion is writing, music, fashion, dance, painting, singing, drawing, teaching or even building things, the list is endless. However, the recognition of a talent is only the beginning. It’s the work that goes into making it more than just something you do alone that sets you a part.

To become an entrepreneur, an owner, or an innovator you must first be a dream chaser. You have to draft the most outrageous goals and believe that each day you will get closer to achieving them. This journey is far from easy. You will have financial burdens, difficult decisions to make and people around you who are afraid to believe in what you can do, these people will try to stop you and bring you down. But God always helps those who help themselves and never puts more on you than you can bear. To be great, you must believe that you are.

It is so easy to stay in bed instead of starting your days earlier. It is easy to break yourself down than it is to build yourself up. It is easy to tell yourself you can’t rather than you can, and it is easier to give up than to keep going.

Today, I challenge you take the road less traveled and do what everyone thinks you can’t. I challenge you to say yes to the opportunity you are afraid to take because you are unsure of where it might lead. Today, I challenge you to step out on faith and do exactly what you want to do not what’s expected of you. Money will come, people will go and change will arise, but the only thing standing in the space of the difference in your life is you.

Are you ready to step out of your way?

Great Expectations

Great Expectations

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It’s a beautiful thing to have hopes, dreams and vision, for without a vision or a plan I think people would perish. But is there such a thing as having too much ambition?

Today, I’m surrounded by a generation confused that the hustle to take care of their young families, buy clothes, or post likable pictures, lies in the scheme of the quick come up. We live in a world where instead of living to work, we work to live and that need for money and status kind of drowns out the very things this land was said to be built upon, such as, morals and integrity. We want so bad that we will do anything to get it.

We each have different motives; different reasons for doing what we do and how we do it, but does that justify stealing from your neighbor so that you can be supported? We have misunderstood what it means to really hustle and grind. When I think of hustling I think of 2 jobs, late nights studying for that masters degree, an internship and a meeting with the mayor in the morning. But in these growing times, it’s the “zoe,” the scams, the stealing, the lies and deception. I watch and hear of people going to great lengths for fast cash so that they can reach their goals. But is there no accountability for the lives disrupted on the way there? What bothers me the most is that no one even cares.

I’m seeing how consumed we are in our own ambitions and dreams that there is no second look to the people we step on to get to where we want to be. There’s no one to blame, we are just a part of society so eager to win the race that we’re off before anyone has given directions. Our situations and needs are different, but I think it’s safe to say our end result is the same… to be comfortably happy. I believe we can be, without hurting one another to do it.

I was inspired to write today. I stood right next to a group of seemingly innocent kids on the bus in Staten Island. The incoming rush of new passengers, ringing cellphones, people talking, “normal” public transportation behavior occurred until this girl snatches an older man’s phone right from his hand and runs off the bus. The bus is rattled. The older man wastes no time. He’s out of his seat and out of the back door running after the girl, who is no older than 14, with the gang of her friends chasing after him with alleged crowbars. The bus driver closes the door and pulls off to continue the bus route.

I can’t help but feel like we are losing sight of what it means to really go after our dreams. I think the tough times are seeping into the growing generation, implanting the idea that ambition is doing whatever you have to by any means, even if it means hurting those around you.I don’t have the answers; I admit I’ve been a slave to my dreams as well. I guess the first step in doing better is realizing you have to.