Work and Life – That is the balance

Work and Life – That is the balance

gettyimages-170068121-1024x1016In the creative field, I’m constantly reading articles, interviews, and posts about how to maintain a work/life balance or how to grasp the daunting reality that there isn’t one and everyone just needs to deal with it. Some pretty intense thoughts to say the least, however, I’ve found equilibrium.

My life motivates my work. I recently went through a pretty confusing break up with my 10-year long boyfriend, I’ll spare the gruesome details but my reality was sleepless nights and tear stained pillows for weeks. Unfortunately everything seemed to fall out of place during the holidays so I found myself entering the New Year broken-hearted, hurt, and oddly distracted.

At first, I was so consumed in my feelings of loss and sadness that there were days that I stayed in bed. But it was in lying there sulking that I realized the story behind my pain and began to write. By putting a name to these feelings, a timeline, characters, and just the realness of my situation into words I found comfort. I went back to work after the holiday break with a fire from the story that I had written and shared with friends. I decided to throw myself into work whole heartedly despite what was going on around me.

Often times, I feel like women have two ways of dealing with emotional distress or just relationship issues. Either we’re so sad it’s all we think about in this seemingly depressed state for a while or we try to completely distract our hearts by busying ourselves with anything else. For me finding this balance was almost balancing both of those. Putting this focus on work and writing wasn’t to distract my pain but instead use it my benefit.

I got to work about 2 hours early daily and really went into grind mode, translating my feelings into focus on all things for my team brand. How can we scale? What can I be doing better to get us to where we need to go? What will the rest of this year look like? This is my balance. Not only feeling but truly being productive despite the flaws in my life made up for the loss I was experiencing. While I know my work won’t comfort me at night, during the day, however, I find peace in productivity.

I can’t say that this particular way of thinking can be an end all be all for all, but it can be a shift of mindset for those who may be experiencing similar situations. Life will always be a factor, it will throw curveballs at us when we least expect it that sometimes may boost our confidence or maybe hurt it. But if we have work that  we really care about and work we enjoy, that work can and should motivate us and work for us with life’s battles. Way easier said than done for sure, but what do we have to lose?

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Dangerously in Love…

Dangerously in Love…

Have you ever been so deep in love with someone that the feeling scared you?

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I’ve always questioned the authenticity of love in it of itself. It’s such a complex emotion, that it makes you do things, and say things, and feel so crazy. I think it makes people the craziest, me particularly, because it is the only emotion that I literally cannot control.

I have no say in who it is that I will love, how long I will love that person, and the hardest sometimes has been to pinpoint the very reason(s) why I love that person at all. Love makes me second guess myself, the things that I was once so sure about, the way in which I go about my day or even what it is that I want to say. Love makes me rewrite text messages to not only get whatever it is that I need to say out, but in the way most appealing to the person receiving it. Love makes me cuddle with my phone on the nights I can’t cuddle up with him. Love just… makes me.

It scares me more so than anything just because I’m willing to do and be anything for that person. I’m okay with putting myself aside, if it means that person will be just a little bit happier. But the best part for me is when they don’t even want me to.

I can hardly fully express the way love makes me operate. I guess that’s one of the hidden beauties of love, the simple fact that you just don’t know, but instead you simply…feel. Maybe the term scared is a bit much. Love isn’t so much scary, but instead so bold that depending on the situation it can be intimidating.

If there is anyone out there with a feeling at all similar to mine, I encourage you to take the challenge and love completely. There’s no sense of being afraid of the unknown or intimidating. We were built to last. The worst that can happen is what you thought was love simply wasn’t. But there’s another crazy thing about it… when it’s real, you just know.

-Kiana S.